THE MARRIAGE BOX

I believe this wonderful poem was originally written by Allan Peterson and called “Myth of the Marriage Box”.

All of us are probably feeling boxed in right now. Christmas is around the corner and the pandemic is keeping us locked away to protect ourselves. (well not all of us …but don’t get me started..ha ha).

And if you are married or with a partner and ‘stuck’ in the same ‘box’ for 10 months it can be challenging. I’ve heard it said many times…”He doesn’t give me what I need….” “She isn’t doing what I want…” . But this is an attitude of taking. You might have started out at the beginning of your relationship with a ‘box’ full of love but if you are always the one taking what you need the box will soon be empty.

We read about a lot more abuse in homes during these past months. Very troubling and terrible and I worry for the abused person. And as sad as it is, it is understandable that even for the most even- keeled type of people it is easy to get irritated with the only person in your space.

So we have to work harder at love. Instead of tearing each other down with little insults or complaints let’s try and give the person in our box a compliment each day. Instead of expecting to be served …let’s do something nice for the person within our walls. Let’s try and be the best version of ourselves even when we are feeling tired or sad or just plain done with this whole pandemic. Let’s come out the other side with a stronger bond because we put some positive effort into our relationships. Let’s always keep the box full as the rewards will be great.

I remember when we had been married for quite a few years people would remark on what a great guy I found and I would joke, “Well, he didn’t come out of a box that way!” We can all learn to adapt and give. And I am learning every day that I need to work at being kind and giving.

“Love is in people”. Let’s show some today to the people we care about most…. starting with the person in our box!